A weekly newsletter for all your intellectual, spiritual, and physical needs
Hello all! Welcome to Volume 165 of Dovi’s Digest.
As you all know, the standard format for this intro is either an aphorism or an anecdote, expanding on that, and then shoehorning in the headline article of the week. This week I’m not going to do that. Because tomorrow is my birthday. Each year I like to take look at the previous one, decide what I liked and didn’t like, and try make the appropriate changes. Along the way I always pick up titbits of advice. So, this year I decided to codify them, and share with you a few lessons I’ve learned along the way, each of which has come in handy. Of course certain bits don’t apply to everyone (see the last one), so pick and choose!
Without further ado, here are 34 little lessons for 34 years:
The more you are interested in others, the more interesting they find you. To be interesting, be interested.
Being able to listen well is a superpower. While listening to someone you love, keep asking them “Is there more?”, until there is no more.
Gratitude will unlock all other virtues and is something you can get better at.
The Golden Rule will never fail you.
That thing that made you weird as a kid could you make great as an adult.
Ignore what others may be thinking of you, because they aren’t. Don’t worry about looking stupid or embarrassing yourself or whatever. No one cares. (This is a good thing)
Courtesy costs nothing. Let the people in the lift get off before you enter. Return shopping trolleys to their designated areas. Lower the toilet seat after use. When you borrow something, return it in better shape (filled up, cleaned) than when you got it.
The time will pass anyway. Maybe it’ll take you five or ten years to succeed at whatever you want to do. Well, those ten years will pass anyway. In ten years you can either have made progress on your goals, or still be whining about how long things take.
Always be early. There is no such thing as being “on time.” You are either late or you are early. Your choice. Remember: promptness is a sign of respect.
If you’re unsure of the dress code, always overdress. You can take off a jacket and tie, but you can’t make a pair of flipflops formal.
About 99% of the time, the right time is right now. Related to that point, since there’s never a “right time,” in your mind, it’s almost always better to do things “too early.” Older people tend to regret the things they didn’t do, or didn’t do earlier. Not the things they did.
Compliment people behind their back. It’ll come back to you.
When you forgive others, they may not notice, but you will heal. Forgiveness is not something we do for others; it is a gift to ourselves. In the same vein, hatred is a curse that does not affect the hated. It only poisons the hater. Release a grudge as if it was a poison.
You do your best work when you’re not working. Your brain needs downtime to connect the dots like your body needs rest to strengthen itself for the next workout. If you’re always working, always trying to download information, always trying to be productive, you’re stifling your best insights from bubbling up. So, when you are stuck, sleep on it. Let your subconscious work for you. (Thanks Dad!)
Take note if you find yourself wondering “where is my good knife? Or “where is my good pen?” That means you have bad ones. Get rid of those.
Don’t take it personally when someone turns you down. Assume they are like you: busy, occupied, distracted. Try again later. It’s amazing how often a second try works.
Never get involved in a land war in Asia.
The biggest lie we tell ourselves is “I don’t need to write this down because I will remember it.”
Write cards. A handwritten note, whether it’s for a celebration or a thank you is always well received. It shows you put time and effort in. (Thanks Mom!)
How to apologise: Quickly, specifically, sincerely. It’s not an apology if it comes with an excuse.
Life is not a straight line for anyone. Ask a person you admire: Their lucky breaks often happened on a detour from their main goal. So, embrace detours.
Trust your negative gut, not your positive gut. If you have a great feeling about something, you might just be excited or gullible or not thinking it through, so take your time. But if you have a bad feeling about something, you’re almost certainly right about it.
Get in shape. It’s not enough to not be overweight, you should be strong and have endurance too. Find a form of exercise you enjoy doing. Focus more on increasing your physical capacity than on losing weight, the weight loss will follow if you’re getting better at running, swimming, lifting, etc. It’s also one of the cheapest forms of therapy out there. Your mind and body will thank you.
Acquiring things will rarely bring you deep satisfaction. But acquiring experiences will.
When someone is nasty, rude, hateful, or mean to you, pretend they have a disease. That makes it easier to have empathy toward them.
Always give credit, take blame.
A great way to understand yourself is to seriously reflect on everything you find irritating in others.
It’s thrilling to be extremely polite to rude strangers.
Everyone is shy. Other people are waiting for you to introduce yourself to them, they are waiting for you to send them an email, they are waiting for you to ask them on a date. Go ahead.
If it looks sad, it needs water. A good rule for houseplants and humans.
You find what you like by trying it, not by thinking about it.
If you stop to listen to a musician or street performer for more than a minute, you owe them a coin.
Don’t be afraid to ask a question that may sound stupid because 99% of the time everyone else is thinking of the same question and is too embarrassed to ask it.
Lessons like these are not laws. They’re like hats, If one doesn’t fit, try another. (Thanks Wayne Terrisborn!)
Do you have any things you’ve picked up over the years and would like to add? Well, I’ve created a google doc for just that reason! Click on this link to add yours now:
Your added extras this week are quite varied. Watch a timelapse of a pepper growing (it’s only about one minute), have a look through 100,000 Stars is an interactive visualisation of our stellar neighbourhood. It works best on Google Chrome. And finally, have you ever wanted to kiss a bug, but your lips are too strong? Well now there’s a Kickstarter to help you fix that (it’s the weirdest Kickstarter I’ve ever seen).
Enable 3rd party cookies or use another browser
The Dovi’s Digest Facebook and Twitter pages will keep you sated between editions, with all new content. Check it out at the links below (or scan the insta code):
you enjoy the Digest? Would you like it to get better? Then please consider sharing it, as the more articles I’m sent, the better it is. It only takes a few seconds, and all you need to do is click here 👇. Thank you!
There were TWO correct answers to last week’s brainteaser. Well done to Ariel Subotzky, and Chaim Ehrlich! The answer and this week’s puzzle are below.
You can also peek in at the world’s coldest library (it’s not for books), find out if Americans swooping in to save animals hurt more than they help, get sucked into the story of a man trying to find the scammer who catfished his mom, how ant’s decide when to sacrifice themselves for others, learn about the incredible secret abilities nature has, take a swim through the story of how a ship was lost with all hands, and finally, the story of an American who disappeared when he went to fight in Ukraine. Enjoy!
Keep those articles (and everything else) coming.
Have a great weekend,
Dovi
And now, the articles:
The Coolest Library on Earth
At the University of Copenhagen, researchers store ice cores that hold the keys to Earth’s climate past and future.
Americans Tried to Save Elephants in Zambia. Were They the Good Guys?
A visit to a remote conservation park reveals the long-term impact on villagers of a crusade by the novelist Delia Owens and her husband to protect animals from poachers.
The Romance Scammer on my Sofa
A writer’s quest to find the con artist in Nigeria who duped his mother.
A Calculated Risk: How Ants Judge When To Commit Their Bodies To A Ladder
(Courtesy of Dovi Joel)
How do social animals judge risk/reward? A new study with ants provides one answer.
The Biologist Blowing Our Minds
Michael Levin is uncovering the incredible, latent abilities of living things.
The Day the Lake Took the Edmund Fitzgerald
In November of 1975, the SS Edmund Fitzgerald left port in Wisconsin for a routine shipment run. Neither she nor her 29 crewmen made it to their destination.
Grady Kurpasi Went to Ukraine to Fight. Then He Disappeared
A 50-year-old Marine with his years of service behind him gave up everything when Russia invaded Ukraine. It would be a year before his family learned what really happened to him.
Quote of the Week:
“Don’t discuss yourself, for you are bound to lose. If you belittle yourself, you are believed. If you praise yourself, you are disbelieved.” – Michel de Montaigne
Facts of the Week:
A pottle is a small conical fruit basket.
To procaffeinate is to put off doing anything until you've had your first cup of coffee.
Pecorous means “full of cows”.
Pullastrine means “of, or like, a pigeon”.
Yawning is contagious for budgies.
Orangutans blow raspberries at each other as they go to sleep.
Growing blackcurrants was illegal in the US for the whole of the 20th century.
It’s illegal in Canada to be drunk in charge of a canoe.
Cartoon of the Week:
Tweet of the Week:
Headline of the Week:
Brainteaser of the Week:
You’ll need to put on your editor’s hat for this one. Can you make this sentence into a phrase by only adding punctuation (commas, full stops, question marks etc.)? You may not add, subtract, or rearrange the words.
that that is is that that is not is not is that it it is
Last Week’s Brainteaser and Answer:
What image should replace the question mark?
Answer:
An image of stew. The images are all anagrams of the cardinal directions (shout = south, seat = east, thorn = north), so the final image should be stew (for west).
Thanks for reading Dovi’s Digest!